Hi everyone! It’s Heather. Being in a relationship can be both thrilling and scary. On one hand, you have this person who supports your ambitions, and cares about your feelings. On the other hand, the more you emotionally invest in your partnership, the more you stand to lose if it disappears. It’s often out of this fear, that communication begins to falter. Suddenly, we wonder what we should or shouldn’t say, and resort to not expressing our emotions as a way of avoiding confrontation.

Of course, we can only hold onto our feelings for so long before it becomes toxic to our relationship anyways. To have a healthy relationship, communication is vital. Knowing that doesn’t always make it easier to confront difficult conversations. To help with that, I use crystals. Today, I am sharing one of my favorite rituals that I use when my husband and I need to have an uncomfortable discussion. It eases the energy of hesitation, and guides us toward a stronger bond. With this ritual, we’re forced to set aside time to make sure that we give each other the benefit of hearing the other person out. This is an especially powerful ritual to use for forgiveness.

Forgiveness is a complex topic. Even with all you may think you know about your partner, you may not recognize where certain triggers stem from. We all have hidden depths and layers. As we begin to feel more vulnerable in our relationship, we peel back these layers. In working with your partner on issues or even in discussions of appreciation, it’s important to remember that there is likely more depth to their vulnerability than you know. To help you navigate those tricky waters, I suggest rhodonite and kambaba jasper.

Both of these stones are perfect work with because they relate to the energy of the heart chakra with the colors pink and green. What makes these such great crystals for forgiveness is that they both have black striations within them. The black is the essence of the things we hold onto and are hurt by. It’s the wounded dark part holding us back from embracing and opening up to the energy of love.

So what you want to do is, have one partner hold the rhodonite in their hand, and have the other partner hold the kambaba jasper in their hand. Find a comfortable seat on the floor where you both can face each other. Hold the crystal over your heart and take 3 deep breaths. Then set the intention of this crystal to hold the energy of “honesty, respect, and appreciation”.

The first person will hold their crystal over their heart and share their thoughts and feelings while the other person sits listening with their palms facing up. Make sure to take ownership of your feelings by using “I feel”. Then when the first person is finished, the listener will say “I hear you” and will then hold their crystal over their heart and speak their thoughts and feelings while the other listens. When the second person has finished, the listener will say “I hear you”. Once you both have shared your truth, the first person will place their crystal back over their heart and say 3 things that they appreciate about their partner. Then when the first person is finished, the second person will then place their crystal over their heart and say at least 3 things they appreciate about their partner.

Once this is done, you want to sage your crystals and your environment to cleanse the energy of the room. Then each partner will exchange their crystal with the other person to hold on to and place on their nightstand. What you want to remember while doing this ritual, is that everything your partner is sharing, is how they feel. Even if their words give you a negative feeling or emotion, it’s important to recognize the significance of how they feel. When you and your partner wake up in the morning, place your crystal out in the sun for at least four hours to recharge them. Try this ritual for 10 days straight. Each time switching the stone back and forth with your partner.

I just want to say that this is a great ritual for any couple looking to strengthen your relationship. You do not just have to do this during the bad times, because you can also say “hey I’m really happy with you” and take that time to communicate with one another. You do not need to be in a falling out in the relationship for you to value taking the time to reconnect with your partner. Maybe you’re looking for an opportunity to establish a deeper bond with your partner, and instead of joining a club together or going to a cooking class all you have to do is take about 11 minutes to commit to just sitting and talking to each other. This ritual is designed to open your hearts so that you can communicate with love.

I hope this ritual guides you toward meaningful explorations with your partner, and inspires new love and appreciation along the way.